I want to get lost
somewhere deep inside of you.
I want to curl into myself
and crawl into your safety,
into that place
where dreams cannot harm me
and words cannot beat me.
I want to get lost
somewhere in the hollow of
your eyes, in the deep
pool of black that sees
me as I am not.
I want to be the girl you think
that I am
and live inside the world of your mind.
I want
to cast my net around the real
and fish it from my heart.
To forget that I can
and will break
somewhere deep inside of you.

-Kate Gubert

Someday I will wash up upon your shore.
Silently, I will wait for your touch
with a lung full of salt water
turgid

Your fingernails pry apart my jaws:
stiffened from rigor
You scrape your hopes from the crevices in my molars
You dig out your soul from my bloated belly
All the while believing that the past can be
undone

My tongue: swollen
with lies. You will cut it out
My eyes: grey-blue
mirroring the sea that rejected my
body. To where water meets earth
Where self meets body.

I will dismantle you
bone by bone
pealing muscle from ligaments
you fall at my ashen feet

Someday you will wash up upon my shore
where we were meant to be from the beginning of this past
that you still believe can be undone

-Kate Gubert

The perfect job for me (in six years or so)

http://jobsearch.usajobs.gov/getjob.asp?JobID=36620690&AVSDM=2008-12-31+15%3A34%3A23&Logo=0&lid=316&jbf571=8&FedEmp=N&sort=rv&vw=d&brd=3876&ss=0&FedPub=Y&SUBMIT1.x=94&SUBMIT1.y=8&SUBMIT1=Search+for+Jobs

Veterinary Medical Officer

You will have a dynamic, multifaceted role protecting consumers as a Public Health Veterinarian. Your duties will encompass closely planning, organizing, coordinating and adapting the full range of meat and poultry inspection operations in privately owned establishments. As a Public Health Veterinarian, you will ensure that plants meet requirements of the Pathogen Reduction and Hazard Analysis and Critical Control Point (HACCP) regulations, as well as overseeing other consumer protection, non-food safety concerns such as proper labeling.

lonely is a dangerous place

sometimes I just want to hate someone

two words that can never be said too often

THANK YOU

SORRY

sometimes I just want to love someone

All I want is everything.

I want shoes that fit me, that don't slip off of my heels or cause blisters on my skin, that have the perfect height and a non-skid sole.
I want someone to talk to, to bounce ideas off of and listen to my opinions, to debate world affairs with and spiritual trials, to complain to when life kicks back.
I want assuring words, soothing words, comforting words, eloquent dreams.
I want knowledge of another culture, to speak it's language, understand it's customs, enjoy it's cuisine and explore it's terrain.
I want to know where my father and his father and his father came from, where they have been and what they learned and how they felt. I want to know who they loved, if anyone at all.
I want the dress and the jewels and somewhere to wear them and someone's arm to lean on.
I want a bedtime that I have to stick to.
I want to be able to help people with more than just my money, to know how to teach and heal and calm and bring peace.